The Unsettling Conviction

I don't know if you noticed, but I changed the title of the blog the other day.  Each morning I get up, make some coffee, let the dog out, get the paper, and then seat down in my den and read and write.   It is a sacred spot and a sacred time.  That setting and the famous story of the other Daniel in a different type of den lead to the name.  I am glad I am in my den every morning and have not faced his. 

Yesterday we took Abby to the ear doctor in Memphis.  Abby has already had about 5 ear surgeries from tubes to rebuilding her ear drum.  We were thankful to find out that the ear that she had surgery on last January has normal hearing in it.  The main reason for  our visit was to check the other one that does not hear as well.  The doctor had previously said that if it did not get better, he wanted to make sure something else was not going on.  Therefore, she had a CAT scan yesterday and everything looked good. She has a conductive hearing problem in that ear.  The good news is she won't go deaf with that kind of problem.  The bad news is that it probably won't get better.  The hearing loss makes her a borderline candidate for  a hearing aid.  We at this point are simply hoping that the school district will help us in a generous way if we need something to help her succeed in school.     Besides missing something in class, functionally she ought to be fine.  We are a loud bunch around her anyway.  Thanks for the prayers.  They are working.

When I read about Saul this morning (www.lifejournal.cc), I thought a lot about what conviction will do to you.  I am convinced he was a very convicted man and did not want to be reminded of the need for salvation in his life.  When Stephen spoke up for Christ, Saul was there approving his death (Acts 8:1).  When Stephen's voice was quiet, it did not quiet the soul of Saul though.  He went after other Christians and 'ravaged' the church (Acts 8:3) and had them dragged out of their homes and off to prison.  He was trying to silence the voice in his soul.  When the church scattered, they ran for protection but God was scattering them as well to spread the Gospel.  Paul went looking for them.  But Saul, still breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest ²and asked him for letters to the synagogues at Damascus, so that if he found any belonging to the Way, men or women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem. (Acts 9:1-2)  Why so determined?  I will always be convinced it was the unsettling conviction of his soul that he was trying to snuff out.  However, you cannot outrun God.  God met him on the road to Damascus and the church of Jesus Christ has been stronger ever since.  
It is amazing to me what the power of conviction will do to a person.  It will lead you to take out your soul's frustration on other people.  It will lead to many innocent people getting hurt.  It will dog your soul relentlessly.  It is not seen, touched, or smelled,  but you can feel it, and, at least, sometimes hear it.  Oh, not audibly, but louder than that.  Yet, its purpose is to do nothing but drive us to Jesus.  If there is conviction characterizing your life today,  don't wait another day, confess, repent, and walk away from your sin and walk into the arms of Jesus.